ELPB’s Living Will Collection

Warning:  this is a joke.

I, _____ _____________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of posturing politicians, religious nuts, or lawyers/doctors interested in simply running up the bills or protecting their butts from malpractice suits.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:
      ______a Bloody Mary
      ______a Margarita
      ______a Beer
      ______a Steak
      ______Lobster, shrimp, or cat fish
      ______The remote control
      ______Chocolate
      ______Sex in some form
      ______Mexican Food of any type,
it should be presumed that I won’t ever get better.

When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and go get a beer.

     _________________________________________  Date